Feb
05
2009

Bill Gates: We’re never gonna survive, unless… we get a little crazy.


From left to right, top to bottom: "Talk to the hand."; An adult-themed ventriloquism act; "Pull it, or I'll have your family sent to the moon!"; and "I put a tapeworm in your rice!"Courtesy Wikimedia Commons
I’m sure you’ll all be glad to hear that billionaire comedian Bill Gates is keeping it real the only way he knows how: experimental performance art.

While giving a talk on malaria at the Technology, Entertainment, and Design conference in Long Beach, California, this week, Gates kept his fellow wealthy tech dudes amused by releasing a swarm of malarial mosquitoes into the conference hall. For a few moments, the delegates were treated to the experience of what it must be like to be intentionally infected with a deadly tropical disease by one of the very few human beings richer than them.

Not one to carry a joke too far, however, Gates quickly donned his Ashton Kutcher trucker hat, and let out a relieving “psych!” None of the mosquitoes were infected! The stunt (or “punk”) was intended to remind the attendees of the conference that, as usual, they were safe from malaria.

“There are places in the world,” cackled Gates, “Where it’s possible to contract malaria even without the help of the richest man on the planet. Think about that! We spend lots more money on crazy rich-person medical procedures than on malaria prevention programs, and y’all should get your ethical priorities in line.”

Everyone at the conference ended up having a super good time, and nobody left with a high fever and severe vomiting. But next time, Gates promised, if malaria is still a problem, he would, “trap each and every one of you poindexters in a net full of dengue-infected mosquitoes.”

Man, the world is so exciting when you make an effort to change reality a little.

Your Comments, Thoughts, Questions, Ideas

harper's picture
harper says:

are we going to have a pop up on pollution?

posted on Fri, 02/06/2009 - 6:33pm
kiera's picture
kiera says:

that is going to be my new moto

posted on Fri, 02/06/2009 - 6:36pm
JGordon's picture
JGordon says:

Yours and Seal's.

posted on Fri, 02/06/2009 - 6:38pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous says:

what an insperation to us all!

posted on Fri, 02/06/2009 - 7:01pm
bella451001's picture

wow!!! thats really exciting:)

posted on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 1:53am

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